| As the offspring of Baby Boomers marry
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| | mind. If your suggestions are requested,
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| and start their own families, the
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| | present them in an open-ended way so that
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| responsibilities of the Sandwich
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| | your children are free to accept or
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| Generation grow. You're already in the
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| | reject. Remember how you felt when your
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| middle of your family in flux - between
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| | mother or mother-in-law shared their
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| growing children and aging parents. Now
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| | opinions about how to raise your
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| the sandwich adds another layer, the
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| | children.
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| grandchildren. It's sometimes harder to
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| | 4. Talk about the challenges. Don't be
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| eat, but definitely quite appetizing.
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| | afraid to communicate with your children
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| It's often said that you don't experience
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| | in a non-confrontational way. You will
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| perfect love until the birth of your
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| | all be more comfortable and appreciative
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| first grandchild. Baby Boomers describe
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| | of your relationship if you don't let
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| this event as an opportunity to slow down
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| | issues fester. However, don't expect that
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| and savor one of life's most precious
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| | the results of your talk will follow a
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| gifts. Iris put it best: "For too many
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| | pre-determined path. Often the fact that
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| years I've been caught up between the
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| | there is conversation is more important
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| dramas of my grown children and aging
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| | than the outcome of any one particular
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| parents. My new grandson has been a
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| | discussion.
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| welcome distraction - and I am enraptured
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| | 5. Be aware of your feelings. You may be
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| by him. Believe me, this whole experience
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| | ambivalent about babysitting often when
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| - seeing my son as a dad and getting to
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| | it begins to impact the pursuit of your
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| know my grandson - is by far the richest
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| | personal interests. Choose a balance
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| part of getting older."
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| | between your own needs and the
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| Do you have mixed emotions about this new
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| | responsibilities of your grand-parenting
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| chapter in your life, with feelings of
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| | role. It is important to set the limits
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| eager anticipation yet some trepidation?
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| | that work for you.
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| Perhaps you're not sure what to expect -
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| | 6. Respect your children. You have spent
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| from the baby, your children, your
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| | years raising your sons and daughters and
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| co-grandparents or even from yourself.
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| | now allow them to raise their own
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| Here is a compilation of suggestions for
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| | children. A lot has changed since you
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| grandparents-to-be, and reminders for you
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| | began to parent - new theories of
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| veterans - honor your children, stand up
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| | child-rearing, new equipment, new
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| for your own needs, and make the most of
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| | techniques. Don't assume that, just
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| this unparalleled opportunity.
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| | because you did things in a certain way,
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| 1. Enjoy the process. Don't worry about
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| | it's the best. Your relationship with
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| the old stereotype of "grandparent" - it
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| | your children will change as you begin to
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| needn't define you. You can add to your
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| | see their capabilities in a different
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| self image without subtracting all that
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| | light. When you hold back, you will
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| you have created and gained over the
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| | notice how naturally and competently they
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| years. Allow yourself to accept and take
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| | love and care for your grandchildren.
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| pleasure in your insights about yourself
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| | In valuing your children's parenting
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| and your relationships.
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| | style, you will realize that the benefits
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| 2. Be helpful, especially in the
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| | can be immeasurable. Mark said he was
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| beginning. Think ahead about the ways you
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| | happy that, "By taking our cues about the
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| can assist your children and offer to do
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| | grandkids from our daughter-in-law, we've
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| them even if they are not your first
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| | earned her confidence and trust. We've
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| choice - run errands, do a middle of the
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| | been given our stripes and the reward, an
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| night feeding, baby-sit early on a
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| | on-going relationship with our
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| weekend morning. You will feel closer to
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| | grandchildren, benefits everyone." Herein
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| your grandchild after putting in the
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| | lays a second chance to make a
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| effort and your children will be more
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| | difference. And a fringe benefit to
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| relaxed without having to do these extra
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| | consider is seeing these relationships as
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| chores.
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| | an investment in the future - your
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| 3. Try not to offer advice unless asked.
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| | grandkids may eventually be taking care
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| You don't have to say whatever comes to
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| | of you.
|
