A Story Worth Living

When I was a child I held adventure near to mya fight; there is always a great battle between
heart. As I lay in my bed I would doze off toour longing and our destiny. Stay with me now. If
heroic dreams; leading an army into battle, fightingthis is true, than all the defeat, the heartache, the
off tigers and scaling a castle wall to rescue mytragedy, the failure and the disillusionment doesn't
princess. In the morning I would rise to rehearsehave to be the final blow, it is not the end to the
my part with wooden swords and cardboardstory, it is the middle. If this is true, it is what I
shields. The maiden was destined to be mine, andwas training for with my wooden stakes and
through my valor I would win her heart.cardboard scraps. If it truly is only the middle of
I remember the moment I felt my heart drop tothe story, there is hope. Shrinking back is not an
my stomach for the first time. I was in the firstoption, because on the other side of this
grade. Her name was Rachel. Traveling down thebattlefield is life, passion, victory; on the other side
Australian coast from my Grandfathers, I laid inis love. It is this vision, I believe, which can provide
my cabin on the train and began to dream. Rachelthe courage and strength to push through the
was there with me, it felt so real she might havepain of transformation.
well been. With the innocence of a child, I held her.And what if there really is a dragon? What if it
I felt her brush her soft blonde hair against mehas just snuck up behind us in our dereliction of
cheek. I still get chills when I recall the moment. Ithis thing we call life. What if it just looks different
remember it so vividly; it was as if the worldthan what we expected?
around had broken into symphony. I had won theWe have found that its fiery breath has come in
beauty; I had scaled the wall and captured herthe form of deep loss, failure, death, fear,
heart. I know, it sounds really cheesy. But berejection, sickness, abandonment and loneliness?
honest with me for a moment. Whether you're aThe wounds are real and they have a way of
man or a woman, you know exactly what I'mburning their mark on our soul. But at some point
talking about.we must decide. We must reconcile our wounds
Fairy tales, music, literature and movies all borrowwith the apparent incongruity between our
from this mythic theme. A strong man coming tolongings and the way life has turned out. On that
the rescue of a beautiful woman, it is written onground we are confronted with our identity and
our hearts and unveiled to us in the purity of ourwe must either choose to lie down in defeat, or
childhood. But somewhere between once upon ato rise up to the moment we have known was
time and happily ever after, we got lost, we gotcoming all our lives.
wounded and we've become cynical.Some may be willing to rise up and fight once,
Don Henley says, We've been poisoned by thesetwice, even three times. But a warrior knows his
fairy tales.place in the battle. A warrior is in it for good. If
That seems like the most reasonable explanationwe desire to have the love and passion and
in response to the futility of our quest for love.adventure that we dream about, that we ache
But what if its not true? What if we have notfor, we must abandon our self-protection and
been poisoned by these fairy tales at all, but wecome to the place where it is no longer about
have failed to take them seriously enough?winning or losing; it is about life and death. For
Roland Hein says, Myths are stories that confrontwhat we attain too cheaply we esteem too lightly.
us with something transcendent and eternal.But he that sheds his blood on the battle field, he
I'm almost 28 years a man now. I've had yearsshall enjoy the fruits of his labor, and his victory
of defeat, heartache, tragedy, failure andshall be heard on the playground in the voices of
disillusionment. Yet I still dare to hope. And as Ihis children, and his children's children, for
recall the stories which have brought me greatgenerations to come.
courage along my quest for authentic masculinity,I think I can do that. It is in me. It is what I have
I realize there is something that I havetrained for. It is who I am.
overlooked. I can never reach the beauty without