| Yes I am 39 years old today. I am normally the | | | | discipline does not mean you are actually going to |
| last person to announce his birthday in a cheesy | | | | use it. |
| effort to have people give me a halfhearted hug | | | | 8. Diapers and formula are not cheap and |
| or tell me how great I am. Today though I stand | | | | Macaroni & Cheese should qualify as one |
| at the doorstep to that wonderful decade that will | | | | food group. |
| represent my 40's. I am not there yet but I | | | | 7. Hot Wheels are just small enough to be flushed |
| would like to think that I am rapidly obtaining the | | | | partially down a toilet and then lodge in an area |
| wisdom necessary to conquer that decade and | | | | where it blocks everything else that attempts to |
| that today I may be able to impart some of that | | | | go down the same toilet. |
| wisdom to others. | | | | 6. The art of removing a toilet and then replacing |
| I am so blessed that my five brothers and sisters | | | | it comes in handy. Let me know if you need any |
| and their respective spouses have all crossed that | | | | advice on this. |
| threshold many, many......many years before me | | | | 5. Not all marriages work out. |
| and will be able to help me through that transition | | | | 4. Some marriages do work out. |
| next year. They may have difficulty remembering | | | | 3. Your children will provide you with laughter, joy, |
| what it was like but I am sure they will do their | | | | and tears. |
| best to help. | | | | 2. Tears of joy are much better than those of |
| Do not get me wrong I am not saying they are | | | | sadness. |
| old, but then again I am not exactly saying they | | | | 1. Life will provide you with both kinds of tears |
| are young either. | | | | and both are required. One type is easy to |
| There have been a great many wonderful people | | | | endure and the other is much more bearable if |
| born on this day. | | | | someone is holding your hand. |
| The list includes Billy Ray Cyrus, Gene Simmons, | | | | There are a few other people I share a birthday |
| Vivian Campbell from Def Leppard, Elvis Costello, | | | | with that I would like to mention. Possibly the |
| Rob Halford from Judas Priest, Jo Dee Messina | | | | coolest person on earth, Sean Connery was born |
| and Rap DJ Terminator X. You would think that | | | | on August 25th. So was the much cuter, and |
| this would indicate that I would surely have some | | | | much more curvier Claudia Schiffer. Fellow Notre |
| musical talent. My family and anyone that has | | | | Dame fan Regis Philbin was born today. Last but |
| ridden in a car with me can assure you that I do | | | | certainly not least happy birthday to my |
| not in fact have musical talent. | | | | brother-in-law and friend Adam Rose who was |
| By the way am I the only one that thought | | | | coincidentally also born on August 25. |
| Terminator X was simply the tenth movie in a | | | | The fact is that I still do not have life figured out. |
| series featuring an aging Governor of California | | | | I would like to make an offer or assurance to my |
| that wages battle in a suit of armor padded with | | | | wife, my children, my family and friends in the |
| Depends diapers and derives his super powers | | | | immortal words of another gentleman born on |
| from drinking a secret mixture of Geritol and | | | | August 25, the great Monty Hall, "Let's make a |
| prune juice? | | | | deal." The deal is this, I will never, ever stop trying |
| I may not know about music but here are ten | | | | to improve my life or yours. In return just |
| things I do know. | | | | promise me that when my vision is gone and I |
| 10. I did not have life figured out while I was in | | | | can not hear very well that you will drive me |
| high school. | | | | down to McDonalds every Sunday for my free |
| 9. Just because you receive a degree in a certain | | | | coffee. |